For your mom

I usually forgo gift recommendations based on specific relationships or holidays in favor of suggestions based on personalities and recurring social events. But with Mother's Day right around the corner (May 8 - don't forget!), I am making an exception. You can't go wrong giving a gift based on your mom's personality, but there are several gifts to consider that are better suited to moms than other recipients on your list (like a house cleaning or laundry service). 

Although most people associate Mother's Day strictly with mothers and grandmothers (not surprising, given the day's name), don't forget about those other women who have been influential in your life and helped guide you to become the person you are today. Consider surprising an aunt, friend, mentor, or any other woman who has impacted your life with a little token of your affection. I guarantee that, regardless of what you give her, the fact that you thought of her on Mother's Day will mean the world.

Here are some suggestions that are sure to delight your mom or mother figure:

Flowers: It's hard to go wrong with flowers. Whether you send them alone or along with another gift, flowers are a visual reminder that Mom is brings light and beauty to your life. Send her favorite kind if you know it; otherwise, choose something bright and cheery like daisies (regular or gerbera), lilies, or sunflowers. Also consider giving her a plant for her garden or a potted plant in a fun container so she can enjoy the gift even longer.

Time: Ask any mother what her perfect gift would be and she will probably answer "spending time with my family." Make her wish come true with the gift of quality time or a visit home. Schedule a family outing, a lazy day by the pool, or even a nice meal together for a gift she will never want to exchange.

Chore Service: Moms of any age have those "maternal" responsibilities like laundry, cooking, and cleaning (if dad takes care of these duties in your family, just ignore this recommendation until Father's Day). Give her a day or two off by outsourcing these tasks to someone in her area, either by giving her a gift certificate for the service or making arrangements with the vendor directly.

Spa Treatment: Moms seem to have an ingrained work ethic that is second to none, and most of them find it hard to take a break and relax. Pamper her with a spa treatment, such as a massage, manicure/pedicure, or facial. For extra points, schedule a spa day for the two of you, or for her and Dad together.

Portrait: I've never met a mother who doesn't love pictures of her family. If it's been awhile since your last family portrait, this would be a great gift for Mother's Day. You could have a portrait of the kids and grandkids made in advance, or schedule a session for the entire family (plan it for after Mother's Day if you want it to be a surprise). For a less formal gift, consider a photo book from Shutterfly - they look polished and allow you to customize the whole thing. You could memorialize your (or your child's) childhood, a special family trip, or visits to Grandma's house.

Jewelry: Jewelry is a great gift for some moms but a horrible one for others. If you know your mom likes jewelry, feel free to give her a new piece. However, if she wears the same thing every day and you don't have a clue what kind of jewelry she would appreciate, steer clear. If you decide to go with jewelry, remember to choose a classic piece and stay away from anything cheesy.

Coffee/Tea: If there's one thing most moms need, it's caffeine. Get Mom her favorite blend of liquid energy or pick up a gift card to Starbucks or another coffee shop. If she prefers tea, treat her to a gourmet blend from Teavana or Harney & Sons. Another great choice is a coffee or tea of the month club subscription, like the Kona Hawaiian Organic Coffee Club, Caribou Coffee of the Month Club, or Teavana Tea of the Month Club (12 Months). Also consider an accessory like a new tea or coffee pot, mug, or storage canister.

Tickets: Treat mom to a night on the town with tickets to a movie or show you know she'll enjoy. If you live close enough or can schedule it, go with her for a double gift of the outing and quality time together! 

Gift Basket: If you can't decide on a single gift, give mom a gift basket full of her favorite goodies. You could include lotion, muffins, coffee, tea, perfume, popcorn and a movie or rental voucher, her favorite candy, a restaurant gift certificate, body wash, candle, or bottle of wine. Put the items in a nice basket she can reuse and finish it off with a colorful spring bow. If you need a ready-made basket, Gourmet Gift Baskets offers a wide selection that's sure to please even the pickiest mom.

What are you giving your Mom this Mother's Day?

For the globetrotter (miscellaneous)

So you've gotten your traveler the essentials and loaded her down with all the gadgets she could need. Now it's time to round out your list with the miscellaneous items every globetrotter needs to make her trip spectacular. These items are the ones your traveler might be able to do without but will enjoy having in his bag.

When buying these kinds of items, again remember that your globetrotter has to carry each item with him on the road. Therefore, you should buy compact versions whenever possible and make sure it is an item that will actually be useful. Don't be afraid to give cash or prepaid debit/credit cards - travelers are always encountering unexpected expenses and can use the cash to buy any items they need on the road.

Here are some suggestions to help you round out your traveler's packing list:

• Travel Journal: Any semi-serious traveler enjoys recording his journeys while on the road. Sure, a plain marbled cover notebook will do, but it just doesn't inspire writing the same way a unique journal does. There are as many journals available as there are travelers, and you can certainly find the perfect fit for any one of them. Try to find a version with some type of closure, like an elastic band, a string, or a clasp, because journals are a great place to stick loose papers and receipts to keep them organized. If your traveler has an artsy streak, consider a journal with blank pages; otherwise, go with lined pages. My current favorite journals feature recycled map covers - you can get a pre-made design or choose your own destination map for the cover (thanks to W for mine - can't wait to use them!). Check out this France journal, atlas journal, map cover journal, map journal with elastic closure, track your travels journal, and leather spine journal, all from Etsy. I also love this journal with travel quotes inside and banded closure (which I received as a gift from my roomie O and took on my first European jaunt - thanks O!) and this leather journal with a tie strap. If you need an all-weather solution, check out this waterproof journal from Firebox, which works with a pencil or all-weather pen and is made from recyclable paper.

Travel map journal with ruled paper, elastic closure, and envelope pockets (shown with a Chicago cover) (photo courtesy of CourtneyGoromboly)

• Convertible Tote: Try as they may, globetrotters often don't know the exact kind or size bag they will need until they need it. Preempt any luggage mini-crises with a convertible tote or bag that becomes exactly what your traveler needs it to be. For women, I like this convertible tote/purse from Uncommon Goods that can be an original tote, a boat tote, or a doctor's bag. For men, I would choose this Timbuk2 bag that alternates between a messenger bag and a backpack.

Convertible tote bag from Uncommon Goods (photo courtesy of Uncommon Goods)

• Books Related to a Destination: Travelers enjoy learning about their destination before they arrive and reading books set in the same place they are visiting. Photo collections are great, as are classics like The Three Musketeers (Paris) and contemporary novels like Nelson Mandela's autobiography Long Walk to Freedom (South Africa) or The Beach (Thailand).
• Sleep Sack: These days people are leery about hotel beds, and with good reason. To alleviate some of the tension, many travelers use a sleep sack, which is basically a regular sheet folded in half and sewn together. It is like a sleeping bag but much lighter, often made of cotton or silk. I like this one from Uncommon Goods, which is silk with a pillow pocket and folds to the size of a popsicle. Amazon also sells cotton and silk versions. 

The DreamSack from Uncommon Goods (photo courtesy of Uncommon Goods)

• Map: Most hotels and tourist offices offer free city maps, but these aren't always the best or easiest to use. If your traveler will be spending several days in one place or driving between locations, a nice map makes a great gift. Be sure that the map is in your traveler's native language and complete with street names and attractions, but is small enough to fit into a pocket. Streetwise Maps are best for urbanites - they are laminated and include both street and subway maps. International Travel Maps are better for those traveling around a country, especially by car, because they include regional maps and larger-scale features like national parks, airports, border crossings, and railways, in addition to streets and highways.

Streetwise Maps (shown: Zurich) are available for many major world cities and regions (photo courtesy of Amazon)

• First Aid Kit: Every traveler needs a well-stocked first aid kit to prevent and treat any health issues on the road. You can make your own, but I recommend buying one that's already assembled (this is cheaper and saves you the hassle of trying to fit everything into a small space). A good first aid kit for travelers to urban areas and developed nations should include basic over-the-counter medicine (pain relievers, antacids, anti-diarrheals, cold/sinus relief, and benadryl), band-aids (in a variety of sizes), anti-bacterial cream and wipes, tweezers, anti-itch cream, eye drops, gloves, gauze, and first aid tape. For anyone venturing to less-developed areas or anywhere without ready access to adequate health facilities, consider including more powerful medication like anti-malaria pills, water purifying tablets, and antibiotics or anti-viral tablets (your traveler may need to procure some of these items on her own from her doctor, and thus may find cash more useful). An Epi-Pen is also essential for anyone with significant allergies, regardless of her destination, but is available only with a prescription. Anyone who insists on traveling to a location experiencing a health epidemic (like I did when I went to Europe during the H1N1 outbreak - no pig flu was going to get between me and Paris!) may need to carry the treatment with her in case it is in short supply or exorbitantly priced at the destination. Again, a prescription is likely needed and thus cash would be helpful.



Adventure Medical Kits World Travel Medical and First Aid Kit(photo courtesy of Amazon)

• Travel Games: Even the most engaged travelers get bored sometimes on the road. A fun travel game can be the perfect cure for a rainy afternoon, a long train ride, or a sleepless night. Choose a game that has wide appeal so that your traveler has a better chance of finding someone to play with him on the road and he won't get bored after playing once. A deck of cards is a must for any traveler taking a backpacking route, and lots of games have travel versions. Some classics are Travel Battleship, Travel Connect Four, Travel Scrabble, 12 in 1 travel Magnetic Games, and Travel Guess Who. There are also plenty of newer games available, such as Would You Rather?, Bananagrams, Apples To Apples, and travel bingo.

Travel Battleship (photo courtesy of Amazon)

• Language Instruction: A globetrotter who is planning a visit to somewhere small like Luxembourg probably doesn't need to know Luxembourgish before her trip - the population widely speaks English as well as French and German and, unless she plans to spend a significant amount of time there, she won't get much use out of a language only spoken in one small country. However, someone taking a 6 month tour of Central and South America would find Spanish lessons very helpful. Consider a home instruction program like Rosetta Stone (more comprehensive) or Pimsleur (quicker), a teach-yourself book, or a voucher for a class at a local college. But before you buy, make sure your traveler is actually interested in learning the language and not planning to rely on a translation device or just wing it.

Rosetta Stone offers up to 5 levels of instruction in 31 languages (Spanish Level 1 shown) (photo courtesy of Amazon)

• Hard Rock Cafe Membership: Some travelers will want to shoot me for even mentioning such an American experience in the same sentence as traveling, but I am doing it anyway. I collect Hard Rock t-shirts from the cities I visit (and pick up pins for friends), I like the food, and sometimes I just need a break from trying to convey to my server (in another language) that I am allergic to shellfish. If you are shopping for a traveler like me, consider giving a Hard Rock membership. It is only $25 for a permanent membership and includes preferred seating at HR cafes, room upgrades and late check-ins at HR hotels and casinos, $20 in rewards for HR merchandise, and a year-long subscription to Rolling Stone magazine. Every time the card holder makes a purchase at an HR location (including the gift shop), he earns reward points that he can later redeem like cash at HR locations. I bought a membership in Berlin along with meal, a shirt, and pin, and had already earned a $15 credit that I used in Madrid. It is well worth the $25 if you think your traveler might visit a HR location on this or any upcoming travels.
• Gift Basket: If you want to give multiple items or none of these suggestions seem appealing, a gift basket is a great choice. You could include the small but much-appreciated items that travelers depend on, such as toilet seat covers, hand sanitizer, toilet paper rolls, shampoo/conditioner/soap, sunscreen, bug spray, TSA-approved plastic bags, laundry detergent, and lotion (all travel-sized, of course). If your globetrotter doesn't have a cell phone that makes international calls, throw in a good old fashioned phone card or Skype credit. Top it all off with a magazine or puzzle book, chewing gum, and earplugs, and you have a perfect way to say bon voyage. 

What are your favorite random items for traveling? 

For the film buff

Tonight was the beginning of the prime time Hollywood awards season. The Golden Globes kicked things off and will be followed closely by the Screen Actors Guild Awards (January 30), BAFTAs (February 13), the Academy Awards (February 27), and several other events that allow Hollywood to get fancied up and heap praise upon itself. Awards season also means that some of the best movies of the year are playing at the theaters or newly available to purchase, so otherwise recreational movie-goers transform into hard-core see-all-the-nominees film fiends. 

But there are some people who love movies year-round, regardless of awards, popularity, genre, or critical reception. These people appreciate the art of filmmaking, bask in the thrill of the story, and know the theater employees by name. Some may aspire to be filmmakers and devote significant time to studying the history and production of films, while others may simply love watching movies. No matter the level of your recipient's love for the silver screen, here are some suggestions to help you choose the perfect gift for them:

• Their favorite movie: although your movie fan probably already owns a version of his favorite film, he may not own it in a new format (like DVD or Blu-Ray) or have the special edition/director's cut/anniversary edition/etc. A true movie lover can't get enough of the extras or the latest version of his favorite film.
• Movie player, TV, or accessories: if your recipient hasn't upgraded to the latest movie technology, she will jump at the chance to experience her favorites in a new way. Consider a Blu-Ray (or DVD, for late adopters) player, HD or 3D TV, projector, or computer-to-TV device like Apple TV.
• Netflix subscription: Netflix is an absolute must for anyone who loves movies or TV. Your recipient can watch online, through Wii or XBox, or at home (depending on the plan). You can choose to give 1, 2, 3, 6, or 12 months of 4 different plans (3 with at-home DVDs and 1 streaming only).
• Book with a movie tie-in: Many movies have books associated with them, either as their precursor or written after the fact. If a movie is at all popular, there is probably a book about it. If no book is directly on point, you could give one with a similar history or on the same topic (e.g. a WWII history or a personal account of D-Day for a Saving Private Ryan lover).
• Movie poster: there is something about movie posters that brings home the theater experience. Choose an original if you can find it; otherwise go with a reprint or even a foreign language print. Bonus points if you find a limited edition or one autographed by someone associated with the movie.
• Gift certificate/card: a voucher for a local theater or an online ticket site like Fandango will allow your movie buff to continue her love affair with the newest additions to the silver screen. You could also give a movie rental (like Blockbuster) or an iTunes gift card (to buy or rent movies or TV shows).
• Movie food: although this isn't an actual food category, anyone who has been to the movies knows what I mean. Buttery popcorn, sugary candy, and huge soft drinks are just a few of the things that make the movie viewing process complete. Throw in some special seasonings and a theater-like movie tub for the popcorn, and you will add the finishing touch to your recipient's next viewing experience.
• Movie-themed games: see how much he really knows with a trivia game about his favorite movie (or movies in general). You could also choose a movie edition of another game, such as Lord of the Rings Trivial Pursuit DVD Game: Trilogy Edition or Scene It? Deluxe Movie 2nd Edition.
• IMDb Pro subscription: IMDb (Internet Movie Database) is the go-to website for movies. For $15.95 per month, an IMDb Pro membership allows access to in-depth actor information, film production details, and show business contacts. This is the closest your film buff will get to being a Hollywood insider without actually breaking into the business.
• Movie cataloguing software: most movie lovers have lots of titles in their collection, and this software makes cataloguing them a breeze. Packages start at $29.95 from Collectorz.
• Gift basket: combine some of the items above into a gift basket, like a movie or a rental gift card with popcorn and a box of candy, for a perfect night of silver screen fun.

If you are looking to spend a little more time and/or money, here are some unforgettable presents that will make you a gift-giving legend:

• Movie premiere or screening: if you are well-connected and can pull this off, arrange for your recipient to attend a movie premiere or early screening. Regardless of the movie he sees, it will be an experience of a lifetime.
• Acting role or visit to a movie set: again, you'll need to have some strings to pull (or just have very powerful friends, who I would like to meet), but arranging for an acting role, even as an extra, or a visit to the set of a movie currently in production is a truly unique experience. If you are able to make this happen, be sure to follow up by giving a copy of the film as soon as it is released.
• Movie prop or replica: look for a memorable item featured in your recipient's favorite movie - the more iconic, the better. If you can't find an authentic item, consider a replica or a similar item, like this villain chair from Suck UK that looks like a prop from a vintage Bond film or a Hamburger Telephone from Juno.
• Film experience: recreate a special scene from her favorite movie, or take her on a trip that follows the movie's plot. My favorite example of this is an anniversary gift for a wife who's favorite movie was The Notebook. Her husband took her to Charleston, SC, where the movie was filmed, and they retraced the characters' steps and recreated their experiences. Or, instead of visiting the film's location, journey to the actual setting of a historical story (like the Scottish Highlands for a fan of Braveheart). If you can't afford to take a trip just for this purpose, you could try to work it into a future vacation or recreate a portion of it closer to home.

What are your favorite movies and movie items?

For a wedding shower

Thanksgiving is long gone, Christmas has come and passed, and Valentine's Day is just around the corner. That can only mean one thing . . . wedding season is imminent. Invest in Bed Bath & Beyond stock, make The Knot your home page, and block out every Saturday between February and August for a wedding or wedding-related event.

Wedding season brings its own unique gift challenges, but the Gift Guru is here to ensure that you enter this year's season of love prepared for any wedding, shower, or party your engaged recipients may throw at you. My brother, B, is getting married at the end of April to K, and I am very much looking forward to their wedding and all of the events preceding it. Rest assured that I will be taking much of my own advice when it comes to gift giving in the coming months.

Today, we will focus on the wedding shower (wedding gifts will be covered soon). Wedding showers used to be known exclusively as "bridal showers," presumably because they were only for the bride. You knew exactly what to expect (at least in the South) - a Sunday afternoon gathering in the church parlor with butter mints, Sprite-based punch, lots of lace, and gifts of towels, china, and linens. Nowadays, wedding showers know no bounds. There are couples showers, which both the bride and groom attend, in addition to the traditional bride-only showers (I'm sure that someone has thrown a groom-only shower, but I only know these gatherings in the form of bachelor parties, so I am omitting them here). There are linen showers, stock-the-bar showers, around-the-clock showers, entertainment showers, lawn and garden showers, gift card showers, book showers, lingerie showers, travel showers, culinary showers, spa/pampering showers - the sky is truly the limit. Regardless of the type of shower you are attending, here are some basic etiquette tips and gift suggestions to get you started.

According to The Knot, it is proper etiquette to give a gift both at the shower and at the wedding (see their full explanation here). You may choose to give a smaller gift at the shower and save a larger gift for the wedding, but the choice is yours. If you happen to be invited to multiple showers (which you shouldn't be), WedNet says that you need not give a gift at all of them, or even attend them all. Feel free to choose a gift for one shower and simply attend the others or bring a nice card with a warm message inside. You might also decide to bring smaller gifts to multiple showers rather than a larger gift to a single shower. One exception to the one-shower-gift rule is if you are a close relative of the bride or groom, such as a mother or aunt, in which case you may wish to give gifts at each shower. In this situation, you might want to buy a set or the entire quantity of a requested item (like plates or place settings) and give one or two pieces at each shower.

Most couples these days have registries at one or more stores, and these can greatly simplify your gift choices. But remember that registries are actually just "suggestions" for gifts, and you are not bound to them when choosing a present. If the shower invitation doesn't include registry information, search for it  at The Knot or Bed Bath & Beyond, or ask someone close to the couple where they are registered. Personally, I prefer to err on the side of caution by choosing something from the registry unless I am very close to the couple, know of something specific they would like that's not on their registry, have access to a gift they would like but can't get, or find a great gift that I just can't pass up. I try to avoid cutesy items, gifts that are only relevant to the wedding (such as a bag that says "Bride"), and items that are too personal (like sheets). My rule of thumb is that unless I know the recipient(s) well enough that we exchange gifts on other occasions like birthdays and holidays, I usually just stick to the registries.

If you have lots of events to attend for multiple people, you might want to choose a staple gift to make your life easier. If you go this route, make sure that the gift is something that almost everyone would appreciate and probably didn't register for. My mother regularly gives quesadilla makers as wedding gifts, and they seem to be a big hit - they are easy to use, work for people of all taste preferences, and most people haven't thought of registering for them (and probably didn't realize that they existed). Other gifts that might be appropriate staples are Nap blankets from Brookstone (which are buy one get one 50% off right now), a set of nice towels in a neutral color (getting them monogrammed is a nice touch), or candlesticks with candles. If you find them on sale, stock up and make your life easier the next time you need a wedding gift.
*A Gift Guru word of warning: always make sure that your recipient will enjoy the gift. If you usually give an engraved cocktail shaker and top-shelf liquor, for example, choose another gift for the teetotaler couple.

No matter what marital gathering you need a gift for, several websites are a great place to start.

• The Knot is wholly devoted to all things weddings. It is primarily a resource for brides, but also offers some great gift ideas and etiquette tips for guests. It allows couples to create their own wedding webpage with information about the ceremony, reception, and their registries, making it the most likely location for finding wedding registries for your recipients.
• The Wedding Channel Store is geared more toward those throwing the wedding, but also has some gift suggestions for guests.
• Bridal Shower Etc. offers tips for planning showers and giving thoughtful gifts.

In addition to the registries, here are some ideas for all of your wedding event needs:

• Anything with her/their new monogram: this could include a scarf/pashmina, towels or linens, doormat, coasters, ice bucket, serving tray, or placemats. Be sure that the bride is changing her name before you give this kind of gift. If not, consider using the couple's first names or initials instead.
• Stationery: in the same vein as monograms, every bride loves personalized items to take her into married life. You could give notecards, personalized stamps and stamp pads, notepads, or traditional stationery sheets, either with her new monogram or both their names. Choose something age appropriate that can be used for formal correspondence or a quick note to a friend.
• Drinkware: everyone needs nice glasses for special occasions or formal dinners. You can't go wrong with traditional wine or highball glasses. If the couple has registered for these items, you might choose something more specific, like martini or margarita glasses.
• Beverages: a nice bottle of wine/champagne or spirits is a thoughtful gift, especially for first-time homeowners or the newly independent couple. Combine with glasses or coasters for a sure hit.
• A massage or spa gift certificate: every bride (and non-bride, for that matter) could use a time of relaxation and pampering to have her stress lifted and energy renewed. If their honeymoon would accommodate it, you might even want to give them a couples massage for when they arrive.
• Group Gifts: if you can't afford the gift you want on your own, ask other attendees who you are close to if they want to go in with you to get a more expensive gift, such as fine china, expensive cookware, or a nice appliance.
• Gift Baskets: if you can't think of one big gift or narrow down your gift ideas, consider making a gift basket. Start with a nice basket the couple can use later, line it with fabric or tissue paper, and start filling. You might pick a theme (such as honeymoon, kitchen, or laundry) or just assemble various items you find interesting or helpful. You could also choose a favorite recipe and give the dishes and utensils used to make it, along with the recipe itself.
• Services: if you are especially good at something, give the gift of your talent. This might include calligraphy, sewing, drawing, painting, pet or house sitting, or gardening. If you can do it well, consider gifting it to the newlyweds. But remember: only give a gift that you think they will really appreciate, and not one that will potentially cause problems or hurt feelings (i.e. don't offer to take their wedding photos if they already have the perfect photographer booked).
• Books: a first edition of their favorite book, a book about their honeymoon destination or wedding location, or a quick and simple cookbook for a new chef can make a great present. Consider giving a bundle of books if you feel like one isn't enough, or choose one book and combine it with another gift (like a basket of goodies).
• Games: for a fun-loving couple or frequent entertainers, a game could be the perfect gift. Fun items are often overlooked as wedding gifts but are much-appreciated by couples. Consider games like Cranium, Apples to Apples, Jenga, or Banana Grams, or a card set with chips. Pair with a card table for an all-around gift of fun!
• Gift Cards: If everything left on the registry is out of your price range, you don't see anything you want to give, or you are simply at a loss, you can't go wrong with a gift card. They are less personal than a traditional gift but much more appreciated than a random present that is destined to gather dust. Pick up a gift card from a store where they are registered, a favorite restaurant or unique experience, or a home outfitter like Bed Bath & Beyond, Target, Pottery Barn, or Crate & Barrel.

As a special treat for Gift Giving Guru readers, here are some wedding-related discounts:

• Save 10% site-wide, 15% on orders of $80+, and 20% when you spend $125+ with this offer from Red Envelope, which offers unique and personalized products perfect for a wedding shower. Enter REDTIER at checkout.
• Take 20% off your order at Linens 'N Things through January 18 with the code WHITE20.
• Save 25% when you spend $250+ at Exclusively Weddings through March 31.
• Bed Bath & Beyond, where most couples seem to register, routinely sends coupons for 20% a single item to members of their mailing list. I often use these coupons to purchase wedding and shower gifts, and most cashiers will let you use them even if they have expired. Sign up here.

UPDATE: No matter what you decide to give, make sure you include a gift receipt in case the couple gets multiples of the item or there is a problem with the product. Thanks to Caitlin for the reminder!

What are your favorite shower gifts to give or receive?